Many of us have had to help a beloved dog or cat out of the end of life's misery. It is a bittersweet moment where compassion overrides the longing to extend the selfishness of extending misery. We all have the ability to simply stop eating and drinking should we get to the point where all hope of recovery is gone.
Powerful story Greg. Both Stace and I have very strict end of life medical directives that we’ve printed out and had notarized. I’m not a person who believes the body is the end all, be all. It’s just a vehicle for learning and awakening to our spiritual truth. I’ve often thought if I got to a place that Debby Purdy arrived, what would I do? I certainly wouldn’t want Stace to be my caretaker, and have her final memory of me being in that state. Also, what is the greater sacrifice…exhausting all your money to live as long as you can? Or perhaps saying, “I’m done,” and giving that money to your grandchildren for their future? There’s a line from the movie, The Horse Whisperer, that’s always stayed with me. Robert Redford is sitting with 13-year-old Scarlet Johansson on a hill overlooking the beauty of Montana. Scarlet lost a leg in a tragic accident and has gone through depression. Working with this horse whisperer/sage has helped her heal. As they’re staring quietly out at nature, Scarlet innocently asks Redford, “Does anything scare you?” He’s quiet for a spell, then simply says, “Getting old. Not being useful.” I think that’s most of us. We want to live, not just survive. Not be a burden. Not be in pain. Stace and I are students of A Course in Miracles. It’s a spiritual self-study that teaches the way to love and inner peace is through forgiveness. The Course puts little importance on the body. That it’s simply a vehicle we’ve created to carry us through this panorama of experiences. When we’ve learned the truth, we’ll discard the body. The body will die, but our real self will not. We can think about death in a new way now. Indeed, death has no power over who we are and what we do. No need to suffer til our last breath. ☮️☮️☮️
My mother has lived with a terminal disease for a while now. She fought to get the papers signed so that she could choose the time and manner of her own death instead of suffering through a prolonged decline. Then once she got the fourth doctor to sign, she decided she wanted to live. That was a gift - that she chose life and regained a feeling of control. (I secretly thought all along that it was about regaining some sense of control.) Now, as her body has broken down to where every day is a fight to breathe, I thought for sure she’d decide to use the option she fought so hard for. But even still - she’s trending toward no. The closer she gets to metaphorically “jumping off the cliff,” the more she clings to life. It’s fascinating and heartbreaking to watch. She says she’s scared to make the leap and I totally understand. She thinks about it all day long, trying to decide what to do. In her case, having the decision be her own to make is both a blessing and a burden.
Beautiful and necessary essay. Thanks Greg.
Many of us have had to help a beloved dog or cat out of the end of life's misery. It is a bittersweet moment where compassion overrides the longing to extend the selfishness of extending misery. We all have the ability to simply stop eating and drinking should we get to the point where all hope of recovery is gone.
Powerful story Greg. Both Stace and I have very strict end of life medical directives that we’ve printed out and had notarized. I’m not a person who believes the body is the end all, be all. It’s just a vehicle for learning and awakening to our spiritual truth. I’ve often thought if I got to a place that Debby Purdy arrived, what would I do? I certainly wouldn’t want Stace to be my caretaker, and have her final memory of me being in that state. Also, what is the greater sacrifice…exhausting all your money to live as long as you can? Or perhaps saying, “I’m done,” and giving that money to your grandchildren for their future? There’s a line from the movie, The Horse Whisperer, that’s always stayed with me. Robert Redford is sitting with 13-year-old Scarlet Johansson on a hill overlooking the beauty of Montana. Scarlet lost a leg in a tragic accident and has gone through depression. Working with this horse whisperer/sage has helped her heal. As they’re staring quietly out at nature, Scarlet innocently asks Redford, “Does anything scare you?” He’s quiet for a spell, then simply says, “Getting old. Not being useful.” I think that’s most of us. We want to live, not just survive. Not be a burden. Not be in pain. Stace and I are students of A Course in Miracles. It’s a spiritual self-study that teaches the way to love and inner peace is through forgiveness. The Course puts little importance on the body. That it’s simply a vehicle we’ve created to carry us through this panorama of experiences. When we’ve learned the truth, we’ll discard the body. The body will die, but our real self will not. We can think about death in a new way now. Indeed, death has no power over who we are and what we do. No need to suffer til our last breath. ☮️☮️☮️
My mother has lived with a terminal disease for a while now. She fought to get the papers signed so that she could choose the time and manner of her own death instead of suffering through a prolonged decline. Then once she got the fourth doctor to sign, she decided she wanted to live. That was a gift - that she chose life and regained a feeling of control. (I secretly thought all along that it was about regaining some sense of control.) Now, as her body has broken down to where every day is a fight to breathe, I thought for sure she’d decide to use the option she fought so hard for. But even still - she’s trending toward no. The closer she gets to metaphorically “jumping off the cliff,” the more she clings to life. It’s fascinating and heartbreaking to watch. She says she’s scared to make the leap and I totally understand. She thinks about it all day long, trying to decide what to do. In her case, having the decision be her own to make is both a blessing and a burden.
Excellent Greg; thanks again for a needed discussion.